Football Club of Grace
Inspiring, Empowering and Transforming Coaches for Christ
The Ultimate Coach - Triangle Diagram 1 Script
DAY 1 (Diagram #1 – Triangle/Ultimate Coach)
This is the very first diagram presented. God picked this first because it establishes:
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God is the head, always and forever
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We work within God’s kingdom through relationship with him and others
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Direction and goal for what our relationships should be
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The goal for our coach audience – this is where we are heading
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Standard for measuring ourselves in our relationships
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Conviction of coaches of how they are not operating in a “straight line” in all relationships
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The direction we all need to get our lives straight, straight with God, ourselves and relationships
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Our responsibility which is always pointing to God in our relationships.
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Insights into our role as shepherd and influencer.
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Conviction of the audience of their sin and flesh especially in relationship to others
This is the first diagram of the conference. You will add some other diagrams and equations so leave room for those. Before you start talking about this first diagram:
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Have a small or regular size soccer ball that you can throw and have coaches throw it back to you as a way to engage them as you wait for all the participants to arrive.
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Introduce yourself
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Share your testimony of how you got started and involved with FC Grace
Script for the first diagram:
FC Grace is a ministry, and I am here to give you something. The only thing that I ask of you is that you be prepared to receive. To be able to receive, like receiving this ball, you need to focus your attention on me and have yourself prepared to receive. If your attention is not on me, you cannot receive it. This experience for the next 3 days is more than just about learning something. It’s going to transform your heart and your mind.
(start drawing the triangle)
We start with the very first diagram. Everyone can recognize what this is - it is a triangle. There are three corners, they represent Father, Son and Holy Spirit. Therefore, this diagram is about relationships. In the triangle, every line is straight. At the top of the triangle is God (write the word, “God”). Here is the coach (point to the bottom right and write the word, “coach”) and here is the player (point to the bottom left and write the word, “player”). The reason we have this is – this is our objective, this is our goal, this is what we are trying to achieve.
You can replace coach with teacher, or pastor, or mother or father, and player with student or church member, or son or daughter. The triangle is about all of your relationships where you hold influence and authority. FC Grace believes that every relationship you have is an opportunity to influence, and influence in a Godly way.
God sees everyone the same. There is no one above or below others. No one has an advantage over someone else. We are all his creation, and he loves each of us, in spite of our choices. Therefore, each of us has the same sun shining and the same rain falling on us as others. We each have unique gifts and blends of gifts, but that does not make one superior over another.
We call this The Ultimate Coach (write the words at the top of the sheet). So why is this so important? Do you see this straight line here? (point to the line between the player and the coach). This represents perfection. It represents a relationship between two people. When I have a straight-line relationship with someone, I can see everything about them, I can trust them, I have intimacy, I have loyalty and compassion and understanding. But this is not reality, we are not perfect. We do not have perfect relationships. In fact, our relationship looks more like this (draw the diagram shown below). A more correct view of our relationships is a curved line containing mountains and valleys. Why do we have mountains and valleys? Because we come in with prejudice, pre-judging, and bias, and agendas, and lack of love and compassion.
REALITY: WE LIVE WITH BROKEN RELATIONSHIPS BECAUSE WE ARE BROKEN – OUR LINES ARE NOT STRAIGHT WITH EACH OTHER
When you entered this room, you were thinking “what do I possibly have in common with him?” You might be curious, but you are also thinking “if this training is no good, I am leaving early.” You don’t care about me; in fact, you don’t know me at all. You’re sitting here with prejudice. You have your agenda, perhaps you are here just to get a certificate or maybe someone told you that you must come but you are holding out until you can get something from me like knowledge. Our line has mountains and valleys.
There are other issues that come in. We have anger, frustrations, limitations. We all come into relationship with our stuff. So how is it possible that we can have a trusting relationship when we are like this (point to the picture above)?
Testimony Opportunity:
(Share a testimony, a relationship you experienced, from your life that connects with what you have just, but do not include how it was resolved. You’re just sharing an example of the problem.)
So, we want to figure out – how do we get here with curved and limited relationships? (point to the straight line between coach and player on the triangle). How can a coach be a wonderful influence on a player will all of this stuff limiting our relationships and influence?
So here is how. When a coach is going to God, over time, God is going to straighten YOU out. God is going to start working on your stuff so that you can start moving without anger, without frustration, without bitterness and prejudice. You will start walking as God designed you. As a player, do you not want to have a coach who can give you encouragement, who does not come with anger and frustrations on the pitch/field? Yes! You are going to perform for a coach who loves you.
Do you want a coach who looks at you with prejudice, who may not even care for you?
Here is what your typical triangle actually looks like. We place God below and behind us. We want to control our lives, but we want God there when we get into trouble and need him. God is more like a servant for us. This is an inverted or upside-down triangle.
But (point to the communication picture you’ve drawn) this is reality. I am going to ask you to start thinking about yourself…what are you dealing with?
I am your guide, and I am taking you on a journey for these 3 days. And if you know much about Old Testament journeys, everyone who took a journey like Abraham, Moses, Elisha – they all had to leave something behind. And in this journey, I am going to ask you to leave something behind.
We are talking here about Leadership. Leadership is all about influence (write “Leadership = Influence” on an open/clear part of the paper). The power of the triangle is God transforming you into an influencer as you continue to point and glorify God - grow, mature to glorify God.
Influence can be good or bad, but it is still influence so you want to be a coach that has the proper influence, good influence. In fact, this relationship (point to the straight line between coach and player on the triangle) is not just about you the coach and your player. It’s about your friend, your wife or husband, your pastor, co-worker. In fact, it’s about everyone in your life.
Once you start understanding what I am going to show you, it is going to impact everything that you do. Some people are put in positions of leadership. They are told they are now the coach, but they might not have the right influence. There are some people who have influence, and because they have influence, they become leaders (write “Influence = Leadership” on the paper). People get into this position because they are given it, or they already have influence. I want to prepare you to have the right influence so that everything you do is leading people in Godly goodness.
See how big this is? This is not just about teaching someone how to pass a soccer/football. This is about everything you are, in your heart and your mind.
I am going to convince you that winning the game is no longer THE goal. Winning become a by-produce of a coach who has straight lines with his/her player. The best players and teams are those who are highly motivated and WANT to play for their coach. This is the key.
I am taking you on this journey. We are starting here (point to the top curve of the communication diagram) and like this hill and valley (point to the valley in the communication diagram), I am taking you down into the valley. I am going to take you to a place right here (point again to the valley), and it is very heavy and very impactful, and we will take you out of this, but you have to be here all 3 days for that. If you are just here today and you do not come back, you are going to be down here (point to the valley). That is not where we want you to be. But I have to take you here (point to the valley) – why? Why do we have to go down here? Because a good leader must understand themselves, and the reality that they are living in.
You must have knowledge (in a new space, write the word “knowledge” then “+”) but knowledge in and of itself is not sufficient. You must also have understanding (write “understanding” and then add another “+”). I am taking you on a journey and I am going to give you knowledge, and I am going to give you understanding, and also, we are going to apply (write “application”). There is one more element here which I will share later, and all of this equals wisdom (write “+ ? = wisdom” to complete the equation).
(**Note: the answer to the? is Holy Spirit)
If I have a ball, and I have knowledge, I know how to pass the ball. But if I passed it to the other team, I do not have understanding. I want to be able to use this in the right way. And that takes us into application. Now I want to do things smartly and in an effective way. For example, I want to lead a player into a space, and that is leading me to wisdom.
Here is an example. The fact is that God is on top, and we are below. This is knowledge of the truth in how we operate in our relationships. Perhaps this is revelatory for you – brand new – never considered. Here is the application. We like to point our finger at those around us, blaming them for our problems, poor performance etc. But here and for the next two days we are going to turn our finger from pointing at others and redirect it directly to our own hearts. If we can apply this truth, we will be able to do amazing things over the next three days.
These diagrams I am going to present to you are going to provide you with this (point to the equation). In fact, in the next three days, you will learn how to apply this new knowledge and understanding. And then you are going to say, “Oh my goodness. Now I totally understand.”
Supporting Scripture (You can write the verse reference on the chart and/or read your choice of verses to the audience)
● James 4:7-10 Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Lament and mourn and weep!
● Matthew 22:37-39 “And he said to him, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great first commandment. And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself."
● John 13:34-35 “A new commandment I give to you, to love one another. Just as I have loved you, you are to love one another. By this, all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.
● 2 Corinthians 4:5 “For what we proclaim is not ourselves but Christ Jesus as Lord, and ourselves as your servants for Jesus’ sake.”
● 1 Corinthians 2:2 “For I decided to know nothing among you except Jesus Christ and him crucified.”
● Isaiah 48:6 Draw near to me, hear this: from the beginning I have not spoken in secret, from the time it came to be I have been there.” And now the Lord GOD has sent me, and his Spirit
Small Group Breakout – Questions to consider
● How do you think God feels about you and what do you think you have done to your relationship with God?
● What are the things you have in your mountains that prevent you from having a straight relationship
● Do you have a relationship with God?
● Do you have God leading you or following you?
● Have you ever considered allowing God to lead you?
● Can you identify frustration in past or present relationships?
● What are some of the benefits of having straight line relationships?
